August 10, 2012 § Leave a Comment
First published on SB NATION, 30 March 2012
Unless you’ve spent the last week caged in the kitchen of a sinister but short-sighted witch — and if so, congratulations on your escape, and I can’t believe the old chicken-bone-as-finger trick still works — you’ll be aware that last Saturday, Peter Crouch scored a goal against Manchester City that was really rather special. Our very own Calum Mechie goes into more detail about the wonder of the goal itselfhere, but to sum up, WOOOOBLIMEYHOWTHEFLIPPINGCROUCH?!?!?!?!11!!1!12!. (Or, if you’re a City fan: [deleted] [deleted] [deleted].) « Read the rest of this entry »
May 30, 2011 § 1 Comment
by James Shaw
Interior. Court room. Day.
The room is filled with a garish fringe of suits lined up in rows. Each and every face is devoid of glee, while their brains eagerly tick over their weekly schedule despite it having no direct coloration to their current situation. The scene is unnerving.
Fraud is a crime, and the defendant Peter Crouch stands accused of having deceived a whole generation of football followers for years into thinking that he is half decent. I now proceed to the prosecution. Will Mr Crouch please take the stand. « Read the rest of this entry »