It’s okay to eat fish because they don’t have any feelings
June 20, 2011 § 18 Comments
If Alex McLeish’s acrimonious journey across Birmingham has taught us anything, it’s that a wide streak of contempt runs through the British media: a contempt that dismisses the feelings of football fans with an arrogance that is as startling as it is depressing. « Read the rest of this entry »
Through Gritted Teeth #20: Roy Keane
June 17, 2011 § 3 Comments
by Alex Hess
Let’s get one thing straight from the outset: I hated Roy Keane while he was a player. Hated him. He was a genuinely detestable human being. He was the snarling, fouling, talismanic captain of the club I despised, and perfectly encapsulated all the reasons I loathed them: the relentless, ludicrous dedication to winning, the play-by-my-own-rules attitude, the scorn and disdain for anything and everything non-United. He relentlessly abused referees, he deliberately injured opponents. And yet, in retrospect, I can’t help but respect him. Even worse — as sacrilegious as it may be for a Liverpool fan — I find myself quite admiring Keane The Player. Of course, it’s far easier to take up such a position a good few years after his retirement, with sufficient time elapsed for my traumatic childhood memories of United’s Keane-driven treble-winning side to have somewhat faded, but there nonetheless exists in my mind a genuine, grudging, approval for his efforts in United red. « Read the rest of this entry »
Through Gritted Teeth #19: Patrick Vieira
June 13, 2011 § 1 Comment
by William Abbs
In episode 1F18 of The Simpsons, “Sweet Seymour Skinner’s Baadasssss Song,” Bart’s dog escapes at school during show-and-tell and Principal Skinner is sacked because of the ensuing chaos. Having terrorised his headmaster for such a long time, Bart expects to feel happy at this turn of events. Instead, racked with guilt at the consequences of his actions and missing the competition that his rival offered, Bart tries to get Skinner his job back. With her brother confused by his emotions, Lisa offers him an explanation:
I think you need Skinner, Bart. Everybody needs a nemesis. Sherlock Holmes had his Professor Moriarty, Mountain Dew has its Mellow Yellow, even Maggie has that baby with the one eyebrow.
Through Gritted Teeth #17: Cristiano Ronaldo
June 6, 2011 § 12 Comments
by Hayley Wright
I loathe Manchester United. What could be more loathsome than a club managed by the most odious, hypocritical and manipulative man in football? A club whose fair-weather, glory-hunting supporters only dare to creep out of their Guildford postcodes when there’s yet another controversial victory to gloat about. A club that seems to have the uncanny knack of collecting and breeding players who psychologists believe to be “The most arrogant, whingeing, belligerent tossers in the sporting world” (The Lancet)*. Considering this sensitive issue very carefully, how exactly is it that I came to be an admirer of one of the aforementioned tossers? Thus going extremely self-consciously against every fibre of my being. « Read the rest of this entry »
Rabbit
May 27, 2011 § 19 Comments
Football is a dialogic pastime, and a game closely resembles a conversation. It is, looked at one way, an argument between two teams, which either ends in a handshake and acknowledged parity (a draw), or with one side destroying the others proposals (scoring more goals), and claiming the disputational prize (the win). « Read the rest of this entry »
Through Gritted Teeth #14: John O’Shea
May 26, 2011 § 1 Comment
by James Tyler
When I finally discarded my delusional, wayward visions of dribbling gallantly up and down football pitches for money, accepting my fate as a member of the tie-wearing rank and file – and I don’t knock; it’s a perfectly acceptable life – I began to look upon the game I’ve always loved with fresh eyes. « Read the rest of this entry »
Through Gritted Teeth #8: Alex Ferguson
May 11, 2011 § 3 Comments
by Thomas Levin
It’s hard to write about Alex Ferguson without covering what has already been said before. Very few people will disagree that he is at least one of the top 3 managers of all time: 11 of Manchester United’s 18 league titles, and likely soon to take Liverpool’s record. If you add to that two European Cups (so far), it’s safe to say that he is the most successful manager of our time.
« Read the rest of this entry »
Some of them want to abuse you
April 30, 2011 § 11 Comments
Paul Wilson, writing in the Guardian, recently made the rather remarkable suggestion that “it is debatable whether [Manchester] City fans are trying to offend [Manchester] United fans with the term ‘Munichs’”, suggesting instead that the nickname derives from a desire on the part of City fans to emphasise the differences between the clubs. He cites City supporters who “say they would never chant anything unpleasant or inflammatory about Munich but see no issue with using the word itself as shorthand for United and their supporters”. « Read the rest of this entry »
Through Gritted Teeth #3: José Mourinho
April 29, 2011 § 7 Comments
(c) Richard Swarbrick 2011
by Callum Hamilton
I’m a Manchester United fan, and I did most of my pretending to grow up in the 90s. The ’99 team is of course my favourite. It’s fabled, rightly, for it’s gung-ho attacking spirit, quantity of home-grown players, and refusal to respect any opposition, no matter how illustrious. So why, then, did I also have a fondness for José Mourinho? « Read the rest of this entry »
Who by brave assent
April 22, 2011 § 13 Comments
Bravery is one of the great intangibles of football. It is a quality demanded by fans and craved by managers; it oozes from some players, it is gapingly and shockingly absent from others. You know it when you see it, and you feel it when you don’t. It has been held up as the quality that separates the good from the great; the inspirational from the inconsequential; and, if you’ll forgive a brief lapse into lumpen cliché, the men from the boys. « Read the rest of this entry »
